|
It would be a pity if this interesting, humane, and practical book were read only by parents of recently bereaved children--for two reasons. First, the book is about grief in a broad sense. Its lessons apply not only to the child whose pet, aunt, or parent has died, but also to the child whose parents have divorced, who has suffered a debilitating injury, or who has experienced other forms of traumatic loss. Second, let's face it: every child will suffer a loss at some point, so it behooves parents to be prepared in advance. As the authors say, "our task as parents is to prepare our children to deal with the experiences they will have." It's unfortunate that the book has what might be considered a common structural flaw in self-help books. All of Part I (about 50 pages) is devoted to examining various myths about grieving and mistakes in dealing with it--for example, that the griever should keep busy and try not to feel bad. This is "good advice about bad advice," but it leaves the reader wondering why the authors didn't choose to get on with the plain old "good advice" on page 1. By Part II, it's already clear which coping techniques the authors will recommend. It would have been better to start there. --Richard Farr
When Children Grieve: For Adults to Help Children Deal with Death, Divorce, Pet Loss, Moving, and Other Losses FROM THE PUBLISHER To watch a child grieve and not know what to do is one of the most difficult experiences for parents, teachers, and caregives. And yet, there are guidelines for helping children develop a lifelong, healthy response to loss. In When Children Grieve, John W. James and Russell Friedman of the Grief Recovery Institute, along with psychotherapist Dr. Leslie Landon Matthews, have created a cutting-edge volume that will help free children from the false idea that they "shouldn't feel bad" and will empower them with positive, effective methods of dealing with loss. There are many life experiences that can produce feelings of grief in a child, everything from the death of a relative or a divorce, to more everyday experiences such as moving to a new neighborhood or losing a prized possession. Whatever the reason or the degree of severity, if a child you love is grieving, the guidelines examined in this thoughtful book can make a difference. No matter what the journey involves, seeing hope return to a child makes it all worthwhile. That is the greatest gift you can give to a child you love.
SYNOPSIS This handbook will help parents and others model healthy attitudes to grief and loss to show children how to work through a loss. The commonsense suggestions include allowing emotions to be expressed without judgement and telling the truth about the adult's own grief. Personal stories illustrate the use of these techniques and their success. The authors are affiliated with The Grief Recovery Institute and have written other books on grief recovery. They do not have professional credentials in counseling or the helping professions. Annotation c. Book News, Inc., Portland, OR (booknews.com)
WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING Fred Rogers,Producer/Host Mister Rogers' Neighborhood and Honorary Chairman of The Caring Place (a center for grieving children, adolescents, and their families) There isn't anyone in life who hasn't experienced some kind of loss. It's comforting to know that we are not alone in our sadness and that practical, easy-to-read, thoughtful help is available by way of Russell Friedman, John James, and Leslie Landon Matthews gentle insights on the pages of When Children Grieve. Thank you, Neighbors, for your obvious care.
— Fred Rogers
|
